Solo Travel and Beautiful Santa Fe

Dear Community,

Wishing you a happy November. I love this time of year.

I am just back from a two week personal retreat in one of my favorite places, Santa Fe New Mexico. I am reminded of the power of personal retreat and am excited to share about it.

Have you ever taken a trip by yourself?
Where would you go?
What would you bring with you?
A journal? A book of poetry? Colored pencils? A deck of Tarot cards?

I love going on personal retreat and my recent trip illuminated how deeply I value this practice. I often observe women's eyes widen and their faces flush with excitement when I mention solo travel. Sometimes they have an exciting story to tell that I relish hearing.

I also sometimes hear...
"Oh wow that would be amazing"
"I have always wanted to do that"
"Interesting, that scares me!"

I don't believe many of us women are socialized for solo travel. Thinking in terms of solo travel was a huge shift for me. Honestly it was quite gut wrenching to think of having a special, sacred or delicious experience and not sharing it with my beloved. A whole bunch of feelings came up including excitement, fear and guilt.

Through reflection I realized this is also a common theme for those of us with more insecure or anxious attachment styles. Perhaps the question "Will Mommy still love me if I go out and explore?" or "Will she be here when I return, is it safe to venture out?" lurks deep in the unconscious.

My husband and I have worked hard to create a secure functioning relationship and one where this strong foundation acts as a springboard for personal development. We spend a lot of time together and even more since my practice became remote in 2020. We know that because of our attachment styles we tend to focus on the other rather than ourselves. This is wonderful in so many ways and we take excellent care of each other. It also means that periods of solitude and self focus are hugely enriching. I love that my solo travel puts this awareness into practice. We can better embrace time apart as the fruit of our now (mostly) secure attachment. Talking on the phone also takes us back to the beginning of our relationship when we spent a lot of time on the phone!

In short, solo travel has helped us grow.

When I am on personal retreat, my senses heighten. My spiritual practices deepen and take new, unexpected turns. My creativity sparks. I also get the opportunity to experience parts of myself that usually sit in the shadows. Sometimes I process deep emotions. Usually a personal retreat is resembles a heroine's journey. There are some challenges, some helpers and I return with new perspective.

• A solo retreat is a kind of romantic getaway you take with yourself.

• Some of us travel deep inside by taking an outer journey.

• Personal retreat and solo travel is journey home to ourselves.

Here are some of the wonderful things I enjoyed in Santa Fe to inspire you. Perhaps you will consider this magical place as a possible destination.

Santa Fe is special. The stars are bright. The food is spicy. The energy sparkles. The history intrigues. The landscape sings. The sacred places beckon.

Wherever your heart guides you, I wish you bon voyage.

SANTA FE SOLO RETREAT RECCOMENDATIONS

SACRED PLACES

The Historic Eastside - for me if I am in town (and not staying out in the country) this is the only place to stay. Perfect for the solo traveler that wants to have peace and quiet, walk through leafy streets and still walk to the best coffee shop. Try this AIRBNB for a lovely personal retreat.

Abiquiu and Ghost Ranch - Better than the crowded Okeeffe museum. Go and see the landscapes she painted and walk in her footsteps. Take the little landscapes tour. The drive out there alone will heal your soul.

Santuario de Chimayo - This place has attracted pilgrims for centuries. Go in the fall to be serenaded by golden leaves.

Bandolier National Monument - Go for a beautiful drive and peer into history.

Go and see Our Lady of Conquering Love at the Cathedral Basilica of Saint Francis Assisi (the patron saint of Santa Fe). She is the oldest likeness of the Virgin Mary in the US. I always go and sit with her while I am in Santa Fe. I just sit and Listen. Images - The Autumn leaves at Sanuario de Chimayo

FOOD

Kakawa Chocolate House - Medicinal strength chocolate truffles and elixirs. My favorites include the spicy rose almond elixir, the Marie Antoinette elixir, the pomegranate truffle and the cherry cilli truffle.

The Shed - The most heavenly red and green chili and charming Santa Fe ambiance. Make a reservation in advance and enjoy a warm plate of New Mexico medicine.

Geronimo - A lovely place for a romantic date with Self. Enjoy a fancy and delectable meal and then wander down Canyon road to see the art in the windows while it is quiet and dark.

HEALING

10,000 Waves - This is the place to indulge the senses and nurture the soul. Beautiful private soaking tubs and wonderful healing practitioners await.

Ojo Santa Fe - This is a watery wonderland. Soak in the healing mineral tubs and get a massage. You can also check out Ojo Caliente if you want to take a beautiful drive out of town.

Ark Bookstore - For all your spiritual bookstore needs...in case you want to a new tarot deck or book of Hafiz poetry for your retreat.

SHOPPING

Santa Fe Vintage - Go and see Jules for some beautifully curated vintage treasures. While I was there the whole design team from Pendleton came in and bought a few thousand dollars worth of inspiration.

Double Take - Amazing vintage clothing, art, housewares and more!

Ortegas Weave Shop - For the true and beautiful Chimayo woven jackets, bags, waistcoats and rugs. You can check with Jules to see if she has any vintage Chimayo coats as well, but be prepared to invest.

Grant Hayunga Gallery - Perhaps find a magical print to bring home. I brought home Raven and March Hare...

_____

A witch is not someone who gives herself over to the shadow nor is she someone who relies on social mores and pressures to suppress the shadow. A witch is someone who mothers the shadow, works with the shadow, paints with the shadow. She allows the shadow to infuse her with life through creativity and inner wisdom. She dances with shadow both literally and metaphorically. She has a deep respect for the fecund power of the shadow. Through LOVE she channels shadow energy toward creation rather than destruction.

~ A favorite passage from personal retreat journal musings.
Image - Cyote by Grant Hayunga

Grant Hayunga

Coyote Grant Hayunga

November is Scorpio season and is linked to the Death archetype in the Tarot.

This archetype is not to be feared as it is not about physical death as much as it is about the rebirth cycle and letting go. As my husband says "death to the deadwood and green to the growth." The death archetype inspires us to let go of what we no longer need to make space for something new. It is about relief, rest and a fresh perspective.

Questions for Reflection and Working With the Death Archetype :

1. What are you ready to let go of?

2. Could you rest a bit more?

3. What is most important to you?

NOVEMBER POEM

Self Portrait

It doesn’t interest me if there is one God
Or many gods.
I want to know if you belong — or feel abandoned;
If you know despair
Or can see it in others.
I want to know
If you are prepared to live in the world
With its harsh need to change you;
If you can look back with firm eyes
Saying “this is where I stand.”
I want to know if you know how to melt
Into that fierce heat of living
Falling toward the center of your longing.
I want to know if you are willing
To live day by day
With the consequence of love
And the bitter unwanted passion
Of your sure defeat.
I have been told
In that fierce embrace
Even the gods
Speak of God.

~ David Whyte ~

Images: The shed enchiladas, chimney rock Ghost Ranch, The rose garden at The Cathedral Basilica of St. Francis of Assisi, Autumn leaves at Bandolier National Monument, Gerald's Tree Ghost Ranch, Loretto Chanel, historic east side

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The Justice Archetype

Photo Emily Goodheart

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Dear Community,

Happy October and I hope this finds you well!

I am delighted to be going to Santa Fe mid October and look forward to the roasting green chilis, golden leaves and crisp air. Look out for next month's community email if you want some Santa Fe energy and recommendations.

I have been welcoming and feeling the Autumn season. Autumn begins with the equinox in late September and I find this time of equal light and dark to be a powerful time for reflection. The equinox asks me:

• Can I value the light and the dark with equal measure?

• Can I find gratitude and curiosity in my heart for life's challenges?

• Can I take the cue from nature to slow down and let go of what I do not need?

• What am I harvesting and taking into the winter season?

We are moving again towards longer nights. As the leaves fall to the ground perhaps we too can rest and find the ground within. This poem reminds me it is OK to let go, to slow down and to rest.

Autumn

The leaves fall, fall as from far,
Like distant gardens withered in the heavens;
They fall with slow and lingering descent.

And in the nights the heavy Earth, too, falls
From out the stars into the Solitude.

Thus all doth fall. This hand of mine must fall
And lo! the other one:—it is the law.
But there is One who holds this falling
Infinitely softly in His hands.

Rainer Maria Rilke 1875-1926

During the majority of October the sun is in Libra. Libra is associated with the Justice card in the Tarot.

The Justice archetype is about creating balance on the individual and collective level. Below are some favorite images of the Justice archetype and some questions to help you connect with the guidance and support this archetype offers.

Clockwise: Modern Witches Tarot Deck, Ostara Tarot Deck, Sorcerers Tarot Deck, Wild Unknown Tarot Deck.

Questions for Reflection and Working With the Justice Archetype

1. What self care behaviors create balance in my life?

2. What reparations or changes can I make to foster balance in the collective?

3. What lightens my heart?

4. What boundaries and limits create balance, equity, peace and mutuality within and around me?

5. What is the point? (Justice's sword helps us "get to the point") Existentially, what is the point? How can this Autumn to be a time of reevaluation and recalibration towards what is most important and meaningful to you?

Currently enjoying, reading, watching and exploring:

JUDY CHICAGO RETROSPECTIVE AT THE DE YOUNG - Deep explorations on birth, death, gender, the divine and more. A moving, inspiring and visceral feminist art immersion. Listen to a long interview about the retrospective with Judy here.

BETWEEN THE WORLDS PODCAST - this is a repeat suggestion. For anyone who wants to explore the Tarot archetypes this is a must. When I was in Arizona last month I got into the habit of drawing a card in the morning and listening to that card's episode in the pool! Good times.

JUNG: A VERY SHORT INTRODUCTION - Reading Jung's actual writing is challenging and dreamlike. Books like the above that summarize his model and define the basic topography of Jungian psychology are invaluable. I am reading this one with my husband and a friend. We meet once a week on zoom to discuss. Reading groups are a wonderful and classic way to explore Jungian psychology. Also, for anyone interested in learning more there is a wonderful program at the SF Jung institute (all online currently) called JUNGIAN PSYCHOLOGY FOR EVERYDAY LIFE that begins October 3.

MAKING REELS ON INSTAGRAM - some of you know I love collaging...I love making these little video collages and adding music and effects. Such a fun way to explore a theme or mood.

I recently rewatched the film MARGARET which is now streaming on the criterion channel. This coming of age story stars Anna Paquin in I think her most dynamic and powerful performance. The film explores the impact of trauma and is a very moving and psychological film. It was written and directed in 2011 by Kenneth Lonergan who also wrote and directed Manchester By the Sea which more people are familiar with.

PF CANDLE CO'S Teakwood and Tobacco scented candle. So perfect for Fall.

FAVORITE SPOOKY OCTOBER SHOWS:

BRAND NEW CHERRY FLAVOR ON NETFLIX - Its scary, its disturbing, its brilliant and delicious. Kathrine Keener playing a witch is an Autumn treat like no other.

MIDNIGHT MASS - A deep exploration of addiction, religion, racism, spirituality, death and relationships. Truly moving and intense. A perfect example of why I often love the horror genre - it is a place where shadow material is explored. Vampires, 12 steps, recovery, mystery, suspense, spiritual awakenings all in one place! Read an article about the writer/director and his personal connection to the material here.

Some great organizations to support:

Therapy For Black Girls,
The Geena Davis Institute for Gender in the Media,
The Global Fund for Women,
The Yunakin Land Tax for the Ramaytush Ohlone Association.

Song for Autumn Mary Oliver
 

In the deep fall

don’t you imagine the leaves think how
comfortable it will be to touch
the earth instead of the
nothingness of air and the endless
freshets of wind? And don’t you think
the trees themselves, especially those with mossy,
warm caves, begin to think

of the birds that will come — six, a dozen — to sleep
inside their bodies? And don’t you hear
the goldenrod whispering goodbye,
the everlasting being crowned with the first
tuffets of snow? The pond
vanishes, and the white field over which
the fox runs so quickly brings out
its blue shadows. And the wind pumps its
bellows. And at evening especially,
the piled firewood shifts a little,
longing to be on its way.

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Photo Allison Christine

The Hermit Archetype

Hermit Card Modern Witches Tarot Deck

Dear Community,

Happy September and I hope this finds you well!

During the majority of September the sun is in Virgo. Virgo is associated with the Hermit card in the Tarot. Last month we talked about a wonderful example of the Hermit archetype: Mary Magdalene.

Although some of us may have some negative associations with the word Hermit after quarantine I believe this archetype to be a wonderful and timely ally.

The Hermit archetype is about tapping into resources at our depths. The Hermit encourages us to know ourselves and our values so that we might live beautifully and in alignment with our deepest truths.

Both the Hermit and Virgo archetypes are about consistently working towards our chosen ideal.

The Hermit has gone into the cave to find the light within. After facing the darkness, she emerges and is available to be of service to others in a deeper way.

I believe the challenges we are facing collectively are catalyzing three things on the personal level:

1. An opportunity to reevaluate our lives and make changes based on our values.

2. The opportunity/necessity to dig deeper than ever before, excavating inner resources.

3. An opportunity to face and process darkness or depression that we are usually able to avoid.

I believe that when we are engaged in these three things we are benefiting the collective, building character and expanding capacity for meaningful living.

The Hermit archetype can guide and support this process.

Hermit Wild Unknown Deck

Questions for Reflection and Working With the Hermit Archetype

1. How do I take time each day to connect with myself?

2. Who are my mentors and elders?

3. What am I ending and what am I beginning in life?

4. What measures could I take to decrease chaos and make more space for peace, service and personal exploration?

I have made a few Tarot appointments available in September. If you would like to come in and explore these or any other emergent questions you can book that here. I would love to see you!

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*Tarot appointments are different from and are not psychotherapy. If you would like to join my waitlist for couples or individual therapy please do so here.

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CURRENTLY ENJOYING:

Marina Ray Liquid Silk Album for Relaxation

Strange Magic Podcast: The Hermit

Whispers Red ASMR

Yoga With Adriene

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Mary Magdalene

Dear Community,

Happy August and I hope this finds you well!

It seems lately that my spiritual life and close relationships both therapeutic and personal are the only real substance of life. On the surface of things, near constant change glimmers and shimmers. I find myself celebrating many of these changes while simultaneously feeling worn out and irresistibly drawn to what feels reliable and constant.

My husband, my work, Winnie the Pooh read aloud, these things anchor me in a time of flux.

In Jungian psychology what we call the red thread guides us to our passion, purpose and ultimately leads us home to our Selves.

• Take a moment to ponder the stories, music, films, places and people that excite you and connect you to your core.

Lately this red thread has led me into an exploration of black madonnas of southern France, Italy and the Mediterranean with inspiration from the incredible Allessandra Belloni and has inspired me to also learn more about the legendary Mary Magdalene of early christianity.

Exploring these maternal archetypes feels timely. The mothers and caregivers at home during the pandemic have been top of mind. Many of these caregivers are working from home, managing child care, education, relationships and much more. The pandemic has been hard on women and mothers in many ways and we see the tremendous capability and generosity of women all around.

• Is there a caregiver you could send some acknowledgement and love to today?

• Can you acknowledge yourself for the care that you give?

Years ago when I started following the red thread and exploring the feminine face of God, I was excited and stunned to see how much the ancient Goddess was all around me, hiding in plain sight. I started to see imagery that spoke about wholeness, love, sacred sensuality, nature and deep emotion. This brought a grounded, enlivened, embodied and much more real spirituality into my life.

Metaphorically and literally I was no longer only exploring the nave and the facade of a cathedral, I was going down into the crypts where the goddesses are kept and the old wells still trickle.

Mary Magdalene is another figure who has been hiding in plain sight.

To find Mary hiding in plain sight Kathleen Asbo PhD explains that there are several symbols to look for in ancient art that are associated with Mary Magdalene:

• Loose flowing hair

• The color red

• An open book

• Feet

• A skull

• An anointing jar or container

• Pearls

What do these symbols communicate to you about who Mary Magdalene was and/or the meaning of Mary Magdalene as an archetypal figure?

I have been fascinated to learn more about this inspiring and controversial woman. Was she married to Jesus? Was she a whore as the establishment claimed? Was she an apostle?

Evidence from recovered gospels found in Nag Hammadi Egypt in 1945 and in more recently excavated catacombs beneath the Vatican suggest that we have long misunderstood Mary Magdalene. The image at the start of this email is a beautiful example of what is being discovered beneath the ancient city. The recovered gospels remained untranslated for many years and then two more copies of these texts were found in Greek and Coptic languages. These ancient texts include the 7 pages remaining from the once longer Gospel of Mary. Scholars date the text around the time of the Gospel of Luke and the Gospel of John. Contained in these recovered gospels are many other stories revealing Mary to be the star pupil of Jesus who is described as a wisdom teacher similar to Socrates.

Early Christianity was comprised of many wildly diverse groups led by teachers, some of whom were direct pupils of Jesus. According to the First Apocalypse of James (Jesus' brother), there was an original inner circle of teachers which included Mathew, Thomas and Mary where Jesus conferred advanced mystical teachings. It seems out of this early multiplicity of groups, two major streams developed: the stream of Mary Magdalene and the stream of Peter. Mary's stream seemed to focus more on the interconnectedness of all things and on fundamental goodness.

Everything created, everything born, everything in nature
Is one interwoven life, and everything will return back to its origin.
(from the Gospel of Mary from Joseph Rowe's English translation)

And on remembering our true nature and finding God there, in our own heart or "root."

And the Good is in us, in our deepest nature, it is our root.
(from the Gospel of Mary from Joseph Rowe's English translation)

Peter's stream would later evolve into the more established church and seemed to focus more on sin, evoking a more punishing version of God. Interesting that this version of Christianity gained traction while Mary's stream went underground. It was at this time the version of Mary Magdalene as whore and temptress gained momentum. The following chapters in Christian history would systematically and shockingly disempower women, excluding them from Church leadership and paint them as temptress rather than priestess.

• What feelings are coming up? Take a moment to breathe deeply.

Jesus appeared to Mary Magdalene first after the resurrection and sent her to tell the apostles the good news. She has always been depicted as very close to to Jesus but more recent evidence like this excavated Eucharist table from the catacombs of Priscilla show how instrumental she was as a teacher and early leader.

Mary Magdalene was also an early archetype of love and devotion to the divine as seen in countless artistic expressions of her deep emotion and spiritual passion.

The Deposition, Sandro Botticelli

It turns out that Mary, rather than just a name, was a title given to early Christian priestesses that meant something similar to "nun." Magdalene was a further term of distinction and leadership. This and other writings from recovered gospels, along with many ancient paintings and frescoes showing Mary Magdalene instructing apostles and performing spiritual rites is why many scholars today refer to her as the "apostle to the apostles." There is further evidence revealing Mary Magdalene to be a great student and scholar of the mysteries and to have financially provided much support to early Christian groups.

In Jungian psychology an archetype is the original pattern from which all copies are made.

I have been enjoying and reflecting on the archetype of Mary Magdalene and looking for her in myself and in the people around me.

For me the Mary Magdalene archetype is feminine, wise, generous, passionate, devoted and maternal. She teaches, supports, guides and inspires. She has integrated her Shadow and been initiated into the mysteries. She is tender and powerful.

Moncrieff, magdalene Ascending

Questions for Reflection:

What does the Mary Magdalene archetype mean to you?

Who are the Mary Magdalenes in your own life?

What aspects of Mary Magdalene do you see in yourself?

What magic is hiding in plain sight all around you?

Where is your red thread guiding you now?

Why do you think the story of Mary Magdalene as a whore gained so much traction in the establishment?

Resources For Exploring Mary Magdalene:

Kayleen Assbo

Books:
Mary Magdalene Revealed by Meggan Watterson

Elaine Pagels, The Gnostic Gospels
Esther DeBoer, The Mary Magdalene Cover Up
Cynthia Bourgeault, The Meaning of Mary Magdalene

Resources For Exploring the Black Madonnas:
Allessandra Belloni
The lovely novel Light of the Moon by Luanne Rice
Dancing In the Flames: The Dark Goddess in the Transformation of Consciousness by Marion Woodman

More on these fascinating relics and archetypes later!

Carter Hollman

A beautiful original painting by Carter Holman given to me by my Mother this month. This beautiful woman and the symbolic bounty surrounding her speaks deeply to me of the Mother archetype of of Mary Magdalene. Look at her red shawl and blue anointing jar! The synchronicity of this gift touches me deeply.

Thank you Mum!! Xx

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Holding the Opposites

Waterhouse

Dear Community,

How are you holding up? How is the summer going? Many have talked to me about the pleasures and challenges of being more social...how is that going for you?

According to some sources I trust, feeling distracted and like time makes no sense is appropriate given the current astrological weather. Neptune is waltzing retrograde through Pices. I love imagining this blue, sea colored planet moving mightily and dreamily through space. Neptune holds the archetypal energy of dreaming, longing and imagination and the shadow side of this energy is illusion, escapism and distraction. I certainly I see a rich mix of the both elements in my own psychic, emotional landscape.

Part of me wants to sit quietly, center myself and listen deeply within. Another part of me feels unable to focus and feels a mysterious wind blowing that whispers..."escape, explore, get lost in order to find yourself again."

I am reminded of this lovely scene from Chocolat....

This film is a moving depiction of a woman learning to live with and hold the tension between the stable and "north wind" parts of herself.

I recently re-listened to the brilliant and inspiring Marion Woodman talk about holding the tension of the opposites. In this hour long talk she gives us one of the clearest descriptions of the shadow how working with the shadow or "holding the tension of the opposites" transforms us.

Dialog makes holding the tension and unleashing stuck energy possible. Dialog allows for both parts, all parts of us to offer their medicine and be integrated.

Dialoging with the part of me that longs for neptunian and dreamy escape and with the part of me that wants to be centered and still, helps me find the middle way. Through dialog I honor both sides and through integration I experience wholeness.

In session, I dialog directly with clients and most potently I facilitate a dialog my client has with herself. This dialog unfolds in the sand tray, through the images she is drawn to and through the role play she embodies.

Dialoging might be quite literal, like writing this email or talking with my husband, friends or mentors. For me it is also creative and means paying attention to dream symbols and taking the time to collage. It means exploring film, story, music and art that touches on my current themes and polarities.

What parts of you have been coming up?
Do any of these parts seem different or in conflict?
How are you bringing these different parts out and dialoging or spending time with them?

I wish you a wonderful July and hope that you have time, space and support to honor all the different parts of you.

Sending my best to the parts that want to retreat and the parts that want to explore, to the parts that want to be present and the parts that want to escape, to the parts that are seen and the parts that are still yet a mystery.

You can listen to this Marion Woodman talk here...

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